I just needed to get this off of my mind...

Hey you,

Its been awhile since we've talked, I miss you. I wish that things would have worked out differently. I wish you wouldn't have treated me the way you did. I wish you wouldn't of lied to me, or continue to lie to me, telling me how you miss me, when we both know you don't. I wish you would make an effort to stay friends. I wish people didn't ask me how it feels to love someone with all of my heart and to not get that love back. Sometimes I even wish I hadn't of met you. When I have those thoughts I tell myself that you have done a lot for me. You have taught me so much about life, and about myself. I didn't know I was this strong. I never knew I could slowly start to feel happy again. Its really annoying how you are always on my mind. How somehow no matter how hard I try to filter you out of my thoughts you are still there. The littlest things remind me of you, and everything we have been through. Just know I'm always thinking about you. And even if I kinda hate your guts and can't stand to think of what you've put me through, I'll always be here for you. I really care for you, I think that's my problem...I care too much. Oh well, life goes on as I am slowly learning.You know what else I wish? I wish I wouldn't have been so naive and I wish I wouldn't have put everything I had out there. I guess you don't know much about that...you never really showed your emotions. I wish you wouldn't make it so hard to move on and I'm upset with you because now I shut people out too quickly, and I don't give them a chance. Its hard for me to open up like that again...most people are telling me it takes lots of time, I think they are right. I won't even allow myself to remotely feel something for anyone. Most importantly, I wish you wouldn't of shattered my heart into a million little pieces and left it on the floor...I guess you could call me broken.

sincerely, me.